Sunday, June 01, 2008

The Difference Between Sadness and Tragedy

The difference between sadness & tragedy is the way in which someone dies and how those circumstances effect others. I know this because someone in my life was murdered. He was killed for no reason by people who have not been caught. He left behind a 19 year old son who is now an orphan.

Three young men on bicycles, one with a gun, shot my friend, fatally wounding him on July 31st 2007. I found about this yesterday and am feeling so many emotions that it's how to even name the feelings. My friend had been much more than a friend. He was a father figure and the only man in my young life who ever loved me & protected me. It was not my father but Melvin. Even when I saw him in Detroit a few years ago he was protecting me. The only man who ever protected my life & future.

He had had a stroke a couple years ago & had trouble recovering but finally got better. When my mom, who was sweethearts with him when I was a very young girl, and then 25 years later for a time, hadn't heard from him in a few months she got worried. Was afraid he had a permanently debilitating stroke and couldn't contact us. So finally she sent a certified letter that needed to be signed upon receipt. When she finally got a response back it was from Melvin's son explaining what had happened to his father and him.

The son is without a phone. Without lights or heat. The home he lives in is paid for but there are property taxes and utilities that this 19 year old doesn't know how to deal with on his own. Yes the son was spoiled by his dad. Yes it was a disservice. But Melvin was trying to do his best and make up for other mistakes in his life. Now his son, at this very moment has no mother, no father, no TV, no lights, no family nearby, no phone, no help. And it appears no one investigating his father's murder.

I'm not sure what else to say. This type of death feels so different than any other. All death is hard, but to have a loved one killed... it's shocking & beyond understanding right now. And his son needs help. Needs someone to help him help himself. Since July 31st Melvin's son has needed help. It's high time he gets some.


Sara said...

WOW, praying for Melvin's son!!

Fransky said...

Me too! Thank you so much!

Sara said...

sending a big hug for ya, never an easy thing to go through, glad you have the block party to side track you for a few hours - enjoy it, sorry I can't be there to help join in the fun!