Wednesday, February 08, 2006


It's funny how I never take time to just try & smell the air around me. Maybe because I'm in the city all the time & I'm afriad a deep inhalation will be toxic.

Monday I joined a group of runners, except I'm a walker & they welcome walkers. Anyway as I was walking around the Waterfront I smelled the river & air around me & felt quite wonderful. I really love the woman I'm becoming. After I got home from a book study meeting I was folding clothes & got an inner glimsp of myself. Felt like myself as my woman-self. Then went to the mirror & looked into my own eyes for a while. Sensed connectedness to everyone else's eyes & spirits & started to cry at the wonder of it.

To thine own self be true. Have spent a lot of time not knowing who I am. Now I'm finding out. My pal said today that I wouldn't be at this growing place if I didn't have these 6 years sober. She's right, but I forgot that for a moment. All is wonderful even though I'm dealing finally with some old stuff that I knew in my mind, but had not integrated into my heart. It's wonderful & painful & the essence of bittersweet. So grateful to be alive & to have the beautiful gifts in this little world of mine.

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