Hi/Bye

Well I have not had much time to blog lately and now I'm going to be on holiday through Sunday. Plus I'm really busy today so this will be a shortie.

First off Happy Earf Day!

Okay that's about all I have time for today. But in the meantime if you're a queer woman of color & an activist or even not an activist please join the newly formed google group Radical Queer Women of Color for Peace. It rocks! http://groups.google.com/group/qwocradpeace

With that I'm out.
Peace!
~F

Women in the Congo Benefit

My pal Jamie organized this event & my pal Nate Ashley will be playing there. If you live in or near Portland please join us at Plan B (1305 SE 8th St ) on April 24th. Women in the Congo get raped every day by "soldiers" with various items including wood chucks and bayonets which are not only psychologically damaging but can be damaging to reproductive health and can even result in death. The point of the assaults to to destroy these women and the Congolese government won't create a better justice system for perpetrators & worse some of the worst rapes are done by government troops.

So be a part of the healing and come to the benefit next Thursday starting at 8pm until 2am. Thank you for reading! Also if you belong to an area business & would like to donate a raffle prize, contact Jamie at delia.sailed@gmail.com.

Peace!

~F

I Was Mad & Didn't Even Know It!

Sometimes reading blogs can be a bad thing. That's why I regularly have to take breaks from reading & posting. Today may lead to another break because I thought I wasn't upset about something I read. Thought the blatant anonymous racism out the in the ether of the Internet was something I knew & therefore could be unaffected by. Yet I was wrong.

How this was figured out was after I had already gone agro on someone. While walking to the bank I didn't even realize the post I'm about to tell y'all about was spinning in my head. Not in any kind of loud way, but more like after one thought, a tiny part of this post would come back to me like a burp after a meal. Walking on Burnside ( very busy street) to my destination it seemed cars kept stopping in the crosswalks leaving no room for pedestrians to get by without having to go into the street. One car after another seemed to do this & for some reason when a silver Volvo station wagon pulled so far into the crosswalk I felt nervous to even cross it, I banged on the hood of the drivers car with my fist. Bang bang, my curled hand drummed upon the hood. Needless to say as the driver went by she was unhappy & so to top it all off I gave her the finger. Because you know, that always accomplishes something.

Pause when agitated or doubtful is often said in recovery so I had to stop & do just that. Then a laugh spontaneously poured out of me. Then I felt sad. In thinking why I was sad it occurred to me that deciding a gorgeous woman with an incredible body must be sub- or even not human, because she is Black, just hurt my heart and pissed me off. Pissed because Serena Williams has a beautiful, athletic body that even other Black women think needs to be covered. Sad because many a woman, especially woman of color has to struggle to love her own body & be actually comfortable wearing a two piece swimsuit. Annoyed because racism is so ugly and the people who say "there is no more racism" are so fucking clueless.

Racialicious has a post today on TMZ's post on Serena Williams at the beach recently. I'm not mentally well enough to even attempt going over to TMZ to see what their post had to say but on Racialicious I was glad to see a number of folks admire Serena & take issue with some of the utterly stupid comments that the TMZ site had. Here's just a few shitty things that were said:

"I think you might have found ‘the missing link’ "
"Maybe Black women are not equal to white women—they are built stronger and bigger, and if so, this must be accounted for. So much for equal rights."
And the whopper...
“Is that human?”

Like I said most days I can deal with this stupid fucking shit. But when I see how folks channel what they will not say in public to comments on blogs, saying, at last, what they really think of POC, it is more than my brain can deal with & when I'm already not feeling good, I just kinda short circuit. Anyway I'm going to take a break from blog reading and posting for a couple days. I need to detoxify. But I promise I'll be back soon & with fewer swear words. And here's Serena. Enjoy!
~F

Snoop Dogg's Sensual Seduction. Best Video Ever!

For reals!

More later y'all!
Peace!
~F

More Flowers & Some Friggin' Links

I'm typing in a different font because I can. Anyway I got flowers from my sweetie today. A lovely rose was with several daisies & I decided to put it in my hair today. Pretty eh? It was very hard to take this pic because I was in the bathroom & despite having a mirror it was still a bit of a pain. But worth it because I love flowers in my hair & wanted to share this beautiful flower with y'all!

It's really nice out so I'm not saying much today. I had some really awesome sex yesterday. I've been having constant medical issues that have caused a strain on my sex life. I won't get into the gory details but today I am extra happy because even when my beloved & I can't get it on for whatever reason, we're always close. So it's just that much hotter when we do have sexy time. All day I've been grinning like a fool. Speaking of sex check out this recent post on the Powell's Books Blog. You can actually watch a couple screw. How ever thinks books are boring is sadly mistaken!

Other random items include a dude selling his Blackness on EBay, Arnold Schwarzenegger plans to fight against banning same sex marriage in California and an Iraq war veteran in Ashland, Oregon heals her pain by being a consultant to a play about an Iraq war veteran in "Welcome Home, Jenny Sutter" by Julie Myatt.

Folks have a beautiful weekend!
~F

Just When I Needed Them

Friends in recovery who get it when I have a crappy day (my period is really bad right now!) and flowers. I'm a lucky gal!

Peace!

Friday Links No Mo'. And a Bunch of Other Stuff!

I can't do it. I tried to have some damn discipline with this blog & do something regularly & consistently but right now at this time in my life that ain't gonna happen. Sometimes we have to accept that failure is an option. So for now I have failed at posting great links that I love every single Friday. And for now that's okay. Because I can always try again or try in a way that is different & even better. So for now no Friday link lovin'. I'll still keep all y'all informed of great links I find but it will be back to the randomness that is a trademark of QWOC blog.

So with that I'd like to mention some yummy Internet goodies I found this week. Let's take a look shall we?

My beautiful pal Zee has BlogHer ads on her blog & for the first time one ad actually got my attention. It's called ModestNeeds.org. Here is thier mission:
To prevent otherwise financially self-sufficient individuals and families from entering the cycle of poverty, when this might be avoided with a small amount of well-timed financial assistance;
To restore the financial self-sufficiency of individuals who are willing to work but are temporarily unable to do so because they do not have the means to remit payment for a work-related expense;
and To empower permanently disadvantaged individuals who otherwise live within their limited means to continue to live independently, despite a temporary, unexpected financial set-back.

There are some really neat points to this charity including that it is an accredited charity of the BBB (Better Business Bureau), it's tax deductible and best, 65% of the folks who utilize funds from Modest Needs become donors themselves. The whole point of Modest Needs is to keep otherwise self sufficient folks from floating into a sea of poverty over 1 or two sudden emergencies. It's not meant for folks who are constantly needing help. It's just working or middle class folks helping each other. I think it's a lovely cause!


Okay so switching gears a bit here is something I stumbled upon a couple months ago. It's called the Happiness Manifesto. It can be adjusted by each individual but it goes a little something like this...

1. Get physical. Engage in half an hour of exercise three times a week
2. Count your blessings. At the end of each day, reflect on at least five things you are grateful for
3. Talk time. Have an hour-long - uninterrupted - conversation with your partner or closest friend each week
4. Plant something. Even if it's a window box or pot. And, you must keep it alive
5. Cut your TV viewing by half
6. Smile at and/or say hello to someone you don't know. At least once each day
7. Phone a friend. Make contact with a friend or relation you have not talked to for a while and arrange to meet up
8. Have a good laugh at least once a day
9. Every day make sure you give yourself a treat. Take time to really enjoy this
10. Daily kindness. Do an extra good turn for someone each day

Things have been increasingly busy for me since mid 2007. So I think this happiness manifesto is a positive way of staying on track, during times of good & bad stress. I'll post (hopefully) regular, but random updates on how I'm living this manifesto & what some of my thoughts, feelings & experiences with it are. Anyone care to join me?

And now the dear diary portion of this post. So life has been great and very busy as many of you know. It's gotten busier with great things & I'm so grateful! My only issue is I don't know how to balance a beautiful life. Chaos, drama, ugly moments are easy. I know that stuff. I'm in recovery for a reason after all! So I'm taking baby steps all over again it feels like. Learning how to have success and joy & a productive healthy life is something I have worked so hard to have in this life & now it's here & by golly it's a little (a lot) hard to navigate these waters. Thank goddess for recovery & friends who have experience in (gosh this sounds silly, but it's the truth of where I'm at!) being happy & following their dreams & talents. These folks are helping me remember to stay in each moment and really relish in the gift that each moment has. And doing lots of various step work & going to regular meetings helps more than I can say. Who knew I'd need more meetings in health than pain?!

So as I continue this path I'm reminded that today is meant to be taken in bites. That the creator & it's angels are really here right now, even as I type these words. All I (or we) have to do is keep breathing, keep trying & keep up the faith. No matter how good or bad things get. Peace y'all!

~F

The "It's About Time" Myth. A Note to You So-Called Progressives

I'm kinda tired of hearing some folks for either Clinton or Obama say "it's about time we had a woman candidate." Or "it's about time we had a Black candidate." No it's not. It's not about time. The time, folks, has come & gone & has been past due for many many moons. This country has been overdue for a minority candidate for a long while & by now we should have had a bisexual, transgender, half Asian, half Black, half Dutch, half Jewish, wheelchair using former mental health patient by now. For the love of gawd people stop staying it's about time. No one gives a shit that you think you sound so progressive and tolerant. You don't.

A long time ago I had a recovery sponsor who said "things in this program take a long time." And she was right. In that same vein we can say that things in this country have taken & continue to take a long time. Take for example the Constitution of the United States. It says:
"We hold these truths to be self evident that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness."

This statement was created 221 years ago by our founding "fathers" and though it's debatable what those words actually meant & who they were meant for back then, one thing is clear to me: US citizens are meant to be equal and are supplied by their Higher Power fundamental rights that cannot be taken away. So it has taken 221 years to achieve in this country the idea that the statement I just noted might be something that guides our society and leads us all to joy & freedom. The idea folks. That's as far as some of us have gotten. A number of folks aren't even there, but at least a number of folks see how all folks being equal is a good idea and worth happening some day. Yes progress is damn slow. Because an idea is not an action & the fact that the action freedom fighters have had to take just to get the rest of this country on board with the idea of the constitutions words, has at last had some results. Now mainstream liberals feel a minority (white female or Black male) could be equal if not better than the presidents we've had. That's great, but shouldn't our whole country felt that way at least 10 years ago? How about 25 years ago or even a hundred years ago?

Saying it's about time is a shortcut. It gives us the chance to vote for a minority & feel good about that & not have to do much else. It's an easy way to feel good about our ideas without having to admit we still need to take to the streets to ensure all of us have those unalienable rights. Knowing in this country that so many people are still discriminated against for no other reason than that they happen to exist in the body they are in, is something we need to look at, ponder, then change. We can't stop at casting a single vote & smugly feel we've done our duty as good liberals. We have to do more than just have ideas. We have to get busy, we have to fight, we have to communicate, we have to listen and we have to believe in the strength that our creator's have given us and get to work. That's when this country will move past being a great idea to a great place.

So next time you hear someone say "it's about time" ask them what else it's time for. And then challenge them to go do something about it.

Peace!
~F

Friday Link & 2 Videos

I don't have much time today so here's a helpful link to get more involved in the fight to help end fistula.
www.fightfistula.org
Check it!

Here is a video of the oh-so-scary Reverend Wright. How crazy he is! I mean talking about violence to brown folks in this country. That's so... uhhhh....unpatriotic?

And here is a great response to Mr. Obama's speech on race last week from Dan.

White People, Get Over Yourselves from Dantrification on Vimeo.
Peace!
~F

Spooferific

If you're sick of hearing about the pregnant dad, check out this video about gays discovering the christian gene.

Peace!
~F

The Good, the Bad & the Sad

What a speech Barack Obama gave last week on this Nation's racism and building a more perfect union. I was in awe, impressed and felt for a moment damn proud to be an American- whatever that means. If this man doesn't make it into office, I know this- his speech made our country better. It permanently changed us for the better. He didn't just say words but provided enough inspiration for us all to look into each others hearts and begin to heal. I know most of you have already seen it, but here it is, because we need these words, this energy, more than I can articulate.

And here is a compilation of Fox Sleeze News reporting on Mr. Obama. Despite claims that our future president gets all the praise in terms of reporting, I think this video gives a clearer picture of what's really going on for Mr. Obama in the mainstream press.

On to a totally different topic. Have y'all heard of obstetric fistula? I hadn't until yesterday. Dear god what a horrible horrible condition. Here's a little bit on it from the United Nations:

The smell of leaking urine or feces, or both, is constant and humiliating, often driving loved ones away. Left untreated, fistula can lead to chronic medical problems, including ulcerations, kidney disease, and nerve damage in the legs.

How does this happen you ask? Dr. Mark Linden says: obstetric fistula occurs due to prolonged pressure of the child’s head against a part of soft tissue between the mother’s pelvis. The soft tissue becomes necrotic (dies) from the lack of blood supply and breaks down.

And here's the deal. It's preventable, fixable and is happening to mainly most African countries, India and surrounding countries. $300 is all it takes to repair a mother's fistula with surgery and post op care. To make a needed donation go here! To learn more about this devastating illness click here. If you consider yourself a feminist I challenge you to pay attention to this issue for our sisters in the "developing" world. Here's a story on this nightmare. PBS will be airing a documentary called A Walk to Beautiful in May. View the trailer here.

Sending good thoughts to all you lovely QWOC readers!
~F

For Those of You Who Have Ever Had a Broken Heart. Believe!

That's right kids. Tesla Rules!

Barack Obama

Though I'm reluctant to endorse anyone for president who does not support full marriage equality for LGBTQ2s, I am still endorsing Barack Obama for president. The electoral college sucks, and our system for elections needs to change, and until that happens I doubt I'll feel overcome with excitement over any canidate. That being said, I feel Obama is a uniter rather than a divider. He's not perfect but he will make a good president for how the system is and I like his style. So I'm supporting Barack Obama. Go team!
~F

Friday Linky Dinks. Nazi Homo's, Brilliant Homo's and Geraldine Ferraro

A short post today as I took the day off & don't feel like being on the computer much today. So here we go!

I was going to write a post titled: Oregon Bigots Think Some Gays are Brilliant! But since I don't feel like writing much here's the beginning of the post.

A recent interview with Senator Gary George, co-sponsor of an initiative to repeal the Oregon Equality Act, shed light on how behind the times some of our elected officials can be.

Okay so now there is an update to that interview via Just Out about how Gary George said in a very recent speech that the Oregon Equality Act is not only special rights but agreed with an audience member that these supposed special rights of GLBTQ families are similar to Nazi's. What a douche bag! I'm sorry for calling names but geez. I mean really. I don't even have the words.

Geraldine Ferraro has gotten herself in a bit of a mess recently when she said the following:
"If Obama was a white man, he would not be in this position,” she continued. “And if he was a woman (of any color) he would not be in this position. He happens to be very lucky to be who he is. And the country is caught up in the concept.”

Anyone remember the Gloria Steinem debacle? Well now it's former vice-presidential candidate Ferraro to take a stab at sounding a little less that smart about the current presidential candidates. Here's an interesting take on this whole mess at Whuh?

Enjoy this funny video on the subject.

I'm Domesticated!

As of 3pm today my beloved & I are officially domestic partners in the state of Oregon! We're thrilled! More details later.
Peace!
~F

QWOC Changes

If your reading this post you may have already noticed one change. The brand spankin' newly designed by moi header is my favorite thus far. It's bright, pretty, natural and of course... pink. Plus it's bigger & bolder, which I think aptly represents my nature these days. Anywho I hope y'all enjoy this new header as I think it will be up through summer. The credit for the photo goes to Ian Britton from the website FreeFoto.com.

The other change is on a completely different level. As my regular readers may know, there is a tag I've used for posts that discuss my personal life moments of weirdness or whatever. The tag used was "Life Bitches." After much thought I've decided to take the b-word out of my vocabulary. I don't like the way that word is used to describe women. And it seems to often be used to describe women who are comfortable with power. Overuse of power is as we all know, can happen to anyone regardless of gender & I'm sick of seeing women called the b-word when their being jerks just because they happen to be female jerks. It's derogatory & I no longer wish to participate in such prejudiced language, even if it's being used in jest or for things that don't have to do with women per se.

I'll keep that old tag as it has been used because that was where I was at and like rings of a tree, this blog is a witness to my changes & growth. From here on out though I'll use the tag "That's Life" to describe those bizarre moments in life.
Peace!
~F

The War & That Not so Fresh Feeling + Friday Literary Links + Heartbeats

Yesterday I has breakfast with my sweetheart at Jam, a restaurant that is consistently great for breakfast. While waiting for scrambled eggs, hash browns and a ricotta lemon pancake, I noticed on a wall a sign about a soldier from Portland currently in Iraq. His name is JD and in the picture next to a sign detailing his experiences at war I noticed he was quite handsome in his uniform and thought he seemed like he would probably make a good military officer. The poster sized sign described how cold it is in Iraq, how they rarely get letters for various reasons and that in order for these folks over there to even be able to talk on the phone to loved ones, they must have an AT&T calling card and wait in line for 2 hours. I felt heartbroken all over again for those in Iraq fighting and surviving and living & feeling and being in Iraq. It's been 5 years y'all! And quite frankly I'm getting that not-so-fresh-feeling!

It's been long e-fuckin'-nough. 5 years. 5 friggin' years! It's gone on too long. And what breaks my heart even more is that our troops when they do come home, are left without enough medical coverage, enough money or enough concern. If you have time next Saturday and are in Portland, please join me at a rally and action camp next weekend on March 15th. It's being called: March 15 World Without War: A Day of Resistance and Hope. I hope to see you there!

Okay I better switch topics before I go into a depression. So March, besides being Women's History Month is also Small Press Month. And none other than Walter Mosely is the poster dude for the celebration. For suggestions on titles to read for this go here. I'm happy to say I've read a number of the books listed but would also like to read Lonely Ware wolf Girl and also The Secret Adventures of Charlotte Bronte.

Critical Mass the blog of the national book critics circle has the scoop the NBCC winners. I'm personally very excited to see that Medical Apartheid by Harriet Washington won for general nonfiction. It's no surprise that The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz won for fiction because it's well...wonderful. Anyway congrats to the winners!

My pal Kevin Sampsell gave me an interesting book the other day titled: Sex for America: Politically Inspired Erotica. And it's a hoot. The very first story is a man's encounter with Dick Cheney in the back of a gun shop. Since were in election mode I think there is no better book to get us in the mood... for sex and politics. So check it out. Speaking of sex and writing there is a new award for sex positive journalism aptly called the Sexies. Submissions are being taken until the 23rd of this month so if you have done some sex positive journalism find out more here.

Well I need to go home and feed the animals now. I think I'll be getting a laptop soon cuz this blogging at work off the clock thing is starting to get really old. In the meantime here are two awesome videos of the same song. It's worth listening to them both because one is the studio version and the other is live & sometimes music can be great in the studio & suck live, the this group called The Knife, has done a great job in both genres! The song is called Heartbeats. Enjoy y'all. Much love!
~F

Margaret B. Jones You Did Some Bad Bitty!

From Trans World:

Margaret B. Jones admitted that she lied in her memoir "Love and Consequences: A Memoir for Hope and Survival" and that the basis of her novel was a hoax.

Jones, whose real name is Margaret Smeltzer, said in her book that she was a half-White, half-Native American girl who suffered child abuse while being brought up by foster parents in gritty south-central Los Angeles. She claimed to have kept herself alive by running drugs for members of the Bloods, a notorious street gang in L.A.

So umm yeah. What is funny about all this is Library Journal raved about this faux memoir yet gave James McBrides excellent novel a shitty review. So the lesson here is don't trust Library Journal's reviews! Bad bitty!

More here.

So Too Cute Pic of the Doggies and Moi

Awwwwww!
~F

Hello! It's Been a While. Did You Miss Me?

Golly gosh February was busy! But I'm happy to say I made it through one heck of a full month. Didn't get to do some of the things I wanted to do on this blog though like any Black History stuff. Nor did I post my friggin' interview with the ED of Brother to Brother, which in now called the Unity Project or Oregon. But sometimes one has to cut themselves some slack & I'm okay with that. There were many firsts in February including creating & giving a workshop, being on a panel to discuss a film and writing my first published article. My heart is happy to have done work that truly made me feel like a person creating effective change in this world. Being an instrument of my higher power may not bring power & prestige, but at the end of the day I feel grateful for the opportunity to be of service.

All of these wonderful opportunities came because of this here blog. Though I may not have the readership of say Perez Hilton or icanhascheezburger.com I'm grateful to the readers who have found me one way or another and have read my rants, raves, essay's and various ideas on life. If it were not for this blog and my commitment to keep writing for it even when I'd go weeks without a reader comment, I'm not sure I'd be who I'm becoming. So a huge thank you to all of you who read this and link to me. You are silent but shiny stars in my life!

Some other things are around the corner in terms projects. I'm working on another article for Just Out and have been asked to soon become a board member of an organization I really care for and want to be committed to. More updates on all that soon!

Anyway I wanted to note a few links since I didn't get to my Friday Link Lovin'.

Hysterical website if you love any kind of purebred animal in your life. It's called Obey the Purebreed. You can order some crazy ass tee shirts that are in a propaganda style. Good gawd it's tha shit! Here's my favorite!

If your looking for a news website that has something other than a white white white focus, go visit the great website New America Media whose tag line is: Expanding the news lens Through Ethic Media. It's a collaboration of ethnic media organizations & well worth your time!

One last thing. I'm reading a fantastic novel by James McBride called Song Yet Sung. I don't have time to get into it now, but go get a copy cuz it's good. More on the book later!

Tootles!
~F